Moms, It's Just a Season

Have you ever felt stuck during motherhood where you catch yourself thinking into the years ahead? Where you are imagining children who are a bit more independent, children who are not always whining and fighting with each other and where getting into the car isn’t some exhausting feat?

I have. I am guilty of imagining this. I am guilty of sometimes wanting to speed the clock up to a new point, to a new year and a new season. I relish in those little glimmers of hope where I see my children all getting along, where vacations seem easy and where I realize that two out of three kids can now bathe themselves.

I was finally within a new season of motherhood. Sleepless nights were a thing of the past for the most part and I was even able to wake before my children to have quiet time and to work some and prepare breakfast. It was nice and it was a sacred time for me. Life was starting to seem “easy” in a sense.

As I sit here now pregnant with my fourth and hardly even able to function in the mornings (thanks morning sickness) and with constant waking up at night already (thanks pregnancy), I am realizing that we are going back into a “new” season.

Motherhood seems to be woven with seasons. Some fleeting, some lingering, some exhausting and some completely magical. The seasons change as we evolve and change and as our children grow each day. Each day we are one step closer to the next season. And while sometimes this is exciting when you’re ready for children who get along and are able to ride in the car without throwing their shoes or annoying their sibling, it is also somewhat sad to think about how fast the seasons are changing.

These seasons up ahead on the horizon sound beautiful and peaceful, but there’s also something missing from them. They don’t include things like washing your daughters’ hair, splashing in the bubble bath, cuddling a warm toddler in their ducky bath towel, reading goodnight stories and tricking your four year old to give you a kiss before each M&M you give them.

As new seasons approach and old seasons fade away into our memories, we lose a little bit of magic. We lose those baby features, those chubby toes and those cute but mispronounced words. We may sleep all night but it is simply because we are no longer needed at night for our security and comfort. We may find bath and bed time more peaceful but it’s only because they are needing us a little less and less each day.

I’m trying to remind myself, that as the seasons I am in are sometimes hard and so tiring, that the seasons on the horizon are beautiful but also different. While I can sometimes yearn to reach a time of motherhood where things may be easier, I also know that comes with being needed in different ways than I am needed now. And while some times the days are long, the feeling of being needed now is beautiful. I’ll never be needed quite like I am now. Now is the time where mama’s hugs and kisses make everything better. THIS is magic, Mamas.

So mamas, embrace the seasons. I know it is hard, believe me I know. We can long for the days ahead and for life to be a little easier and while that brings along its own magic, there is also magic within this sweet season. Remind yourself that when the days are hard and the nights are long, that this too shall pass. This season is fleeting and won’t linger around forever. It’s a beautiful time of being needed the most by these sweet, innocent souls. One day they’ll be able to wash their own hair and get out of the door on time, but for now your season of chaos will just have to be embraced. Because one day the chaos will fade and the longing of chubby toes, baby smells and sweet kisses will just be that…a past memory of magic.

Embrace the magic, embrace the season. When it gets hard, remind yourself that it’s just a season and like the leaves fall each autumn and sunshine fades away each winter, one day these moments will fall and fade with new seasons in place. And our memories of little ones will just be scattered leaves blowing away into the wind, locked into our hearts and memories as sacred treasures.

It’s just a season.