You Know You Are a Mother When...

When you find pacifiers in your purse and your car keys in the diaper bag. And you know you're a germ-a-phobe mother when you find the two touching. 

When suddenly the thought of having to be somewhere on time is literally met with a feeling of "oh crap." 

When you're officially late to any and every thing that you have to be at. You're a real mother when you blame it on your child. Tantrums, naps, feedings...there are endless excuses. 

When you learn to thrive on less sleep and more chocolate. Or random glasses of wine when the kids are sleep. Or three cups of coffee in the morning. You need a buzz from somewhere...

When a trip to the bathroom takes either a barricade, a screaming baby or a child who just sits there and watches. And giggles. 

When cooking for baby is fun, but the thought of cooking a real dinner for the whole family makes you want to sling gravy in someone's face. You just cleaned the kitchen. Again.

When nap time is the equivalent to one hour on the beach with a margarita in your hand. Nap times are that freaking awesome. 

When you think more about your child's diet than your own. Here kid, eat an organic baby cookie while mama finishes this package of Oreos. 

When you scream out of joy because you finally nailed Dr. Seuss' book, Fox In Socks, during story time. Okay, I hope at least one person can relate.

When you are certain your child is THE cutest kid ever. And you don't blame it on being biased, it's just pure fact. 

When the bigger the splash at bath time, the better. The bigger the splash, the more the laughter and the more the splash warms your heart. Yet, you dare your husband to get the bathroom floor wet because he didn't close the shower curtain properly. 

When you stress about what baby will wear more than what mama will wear. And let's not mention the fact that baby gets all of the new clothes...

When spending $20 on a pair of shoes that will fit your child for about two months is okay, but the thought of spending $40 on shoes that will last you a lifetime is just ridiculous. My child looks cute in converses, mint green ones to be exact. 

When suddenly housework can wait. There are hugs and kisses that need to take place. 

When suddenly you see the world completely differently. Every thing is new and even more beautiful. It's like you're walking around in some cheesy Disney movie with a bird singing on your shoulder. Yes, life is that good. 

When unfolded laundry is best met with a baby playing peek-a-boo. Who cares about wrinkles these days. 

When hearing the word "Mama" for the first time is more exciting than hearing that there is going to be a "Magic Mike 2." Now, if only I can get Channing Tatum to call me Mama. I'm sorry, did I just really type that?

When you feel as if you can and will never get enough kisses. One day they will wipe them off. And then you will cry...for hours. 

When suddenly you love with every fiber and being in your body that you never even knew existed. For real. 

When suddenly everything bad that can happen scares you to no end. Let's not even discuss this one. 

You know you are a mother, and a damn good one at that, when your baby hugs your neck tight and gives you a kiss all without you even asking them or bribing them. This is when you know that you ARE a mother. Because to that little person, being their mother is all they know. It's what they need to survive, to thrive and it's what they need to grow. 

And now, it's what you need to live.