Am I Doing Attachment Parenting?
Recently in my breastfeeding support group, I saw the term Attachment Parenting and I immediately became interested in it because it wasn't the first time I had heard of it. I had no clue what it was about, but the name does kind of give it away.
I decided to Google the term and I had to simply sit back and laugh a little. As it turns out I am unintentionally doing many things that are associated with Attachment Parenting. If you're like I was and have no clue what Attachment Parenting is about, here is an excerpt off of Dr. Sears' website:
Attachment parenting is a style of caring for your infant that brings out the best in the baby and the best in the parents. Attachment parenting implies first opening your mind and heart to the individual needs of your baby, and eventually you will develop the wisdom on how to make on-the-spot decisions on what works best for both you and your baby.
A close attachment after birth and beyond allows the natural, biological attachment-promoting behaviors of the infant and the intuitive, biological, care giving qualities of the mother to come together. Both members of this biological pair get off to the right start at a time when the infant is most needy and the mother is most ready to nurture. Bonding is a series of steps in your lifelong growing together with your child.
There are several factors that make up attachment parenting but some of them are birth bonding, breastfeeding, baby wearing, co-sleeping, positive discipline, constant love, and more. Attachment Parenting also seems to focus on baby's needs in a way that does not result in cry it out, in other words, all cries are associated with a need and emotion from the baby. It's about an emotional bond between baby and select caregivers (usually mom and dad) that have a positive effect on the type of adult the baby will become. It's all about the emotional bond that the baby has with their care giver (mom and/or dad).
Well, I had to giggle at myself because I do pretty much all of this. I definitely did birth bonding considering I did a long, grueling drug free labor that was the most amazing thing ever // I am still breastfeeding my baby and have no plans to stop any time soon // she sleeps right next to me in her bassinet // I don't do cry it out // and we do baby wearing.
Here's what I think about myself as a parent.
Am I intentionally doing Attachment Parenting? No.
Do I think Attachment Parenting is the wrong or right way? To each their own.
Do I think cry it out is bad? No, I just choose not to do it right now.
Do I co-sleep with my baby in the bed? I don't feel it's safe for us; she sleeps next to me in a bassinet.
Do I think that baby wearing is more important than strollers? AP often promotes baby wearing rather than strollers. I'm NOT opposed to strollers (they're lifesavers); but I do believe in benefits of baby wearing too.
Do I get up every time she's just whining? Nope. I'm fine with "whine it out."
Will I ever say that I am practicing AP? Nope, I just happen to do things commonly associated with it.
Do I think on some level we all AP? Yep.
To sum things up, I do think AP is a great concept. I am a firm believer that a baby has needs and their cries signal those needs. Sometimes when my Little Bug is sitting in her bouncer she'll eventually start whining or fussing a little and before I even reach her to kiss her or touch her, she smiles. Do I think that she's being manipulative? No indeed not, I just think she has a need for my love and attention so she can feel secure sitting there alone while I do housework.
I'm not really sure if I think that an AP child turns out any different than us kids that were raised traditionally. To be honest, I believe that on many levels we all have our things that we do that resembles AP. We all want to bond with our baby and we all want to give nothing but unconditional love to them. We just all do things in our own way.
Every mommy knows what their baby needs and every mommy does what they believe is right for their baby. Some wear them, some nurse them and some let them cry it out until they fall asleep -- we are all just mommies doing the best job we can.
And to be honest, I'm just as attached to my baby as she is to me.
And to be honest, I'm just as attached to my baby as she is to me.
For more information on particular topics, I've provided links throughout my post
Did you ever hear or read about AP?
xoxo, Sasha